[ He felt like he was going to strangle on his own words. Watanuki's two-toned eyes closed tightly. He tucked his chin in a bit, as if trying to hide. ]
B-but that's just how it is! Even though more than anything, I want you to be happy! And-and every time you smile, if feels like wonderful things are happening in my heart, and...
So... [ And his words started to gently frizzle down, but his face was bright red. That was it... that was all he could say, and wanted to say, and now, he couldn't even look Alphonse in the face. He had done it! He had confessed! ]
...I... I've been wanting to tell you for so long... but I was always... too nervous to.
[ There's a saying that silence speaks volumes... ]
[ ...And Watanuki just learned the meaning of it. ]
[ Watanuki remains silent, and his eyes are screwed shut. But when Alphonse says nothing, and when those seconds that drag along turning into crawling minutes, the two-toned boy knew the answer, even when Alphonse didn't speak. Especially since he didn't. ]
[ And he only had two words for it. ]
[ Watanuki kept his eyes closed. He didn't open them. There was no need to. And if he kept his eyes closed, then he couldn't see Alphonse's face, and he wouldn't... ]
[ It took everything he had to keep his voice from trembling. ]
[Al does have the breath to say anything at all, but his heart sinks, his fingers tremble, and his mouth feels dry. For the first time in years he feels like running, just running to the river-
But he won't. Watanuki was immensely brave, to tell him all of this, and Al isn't going to run away to save his own feelings. This was his friend, someone he cared for, even if he didn't care for him like that, that bravery deserved a response.
You -- you are very, very brave. Braver than I am right now.
[He bites down on his lip slightly.]
... I care for you very much, Watanuki, but I... I won't lead you on with false hope or what-ifs. I... feel very strongly about you too, but it's not the same way.
But I want to stay with you, I want to support you, even if our feelings are different. I'm not going anywhere, provided... that's what you want.
[ There were far too many things Watanuki wanted to say right now... ]
[ He had been in Adstringendum just shy of a year now, and this whole time, he noticed something about the people he had gotten to know, and whom he had gotten close to. The world-travelers Syaoran and Sakura had come, and as he thought, eventually left without so much of a goodbye. Yuuko was here for merely a week, and all she did was tease him. ]
[ Neither Doumeki nor Himawari arrived, and while no, he wouldn't want them to come here and be stuck in this crap-sack world, he... ]
[ He had felt so alone. People had others from where they came from... why couldn't he have the same? And why was it always his bad luck, his stupid blood, his stupid dreams, his stupid... misfortune... that ended up pulling through? Above all other things? ]
[ Maybe that was the reason he was stuck in Adstring. Maybe it wasn't about stupid animus, maybe the scientists were just some elaborate bullshit story. Maybe it was just about the pure and simple fact that he was unfortunate, and didn't really exist. Was just a fraction of a person. A fraction. And thus, had no real home, and Adstringendum was the only place available for him to have a semblance of a normal life. And even then... ]
[ And Watanuki hated himself for taking on the whole, 'Oh woe is me' thought process, but for the first time in a long time... for the first time in a very long while... ]
[ Whatever his nightmare had been... ]
[ He wanted it to come true. And he hated that. ]
[ But here was Alphonse, and he knew Alphonse wouldn't lie to him. He knew he meant every word, that even though he didn't feel the same, he would stick beside him, that they could still be friends, that they could be together just as they were. Back home, he had always been on the bottom rung. Always underneath the amazing Doumeki. Never popular with Himawari, or any other girls for that matter. The nice guy... and always last place. ]
[ And maybe... ]
[ ...That was where he belonged. ]
[ And Watanuki's eyes opened. He stared at Alphonse, and now, he couldn't cry. He knew... he really did care for Alphonse... because a part of him knew that even though Alphonse wouldn't ever look at him the same, that he still wanted him to find someone to make him happy... even if it wasn't him. And he deserved someone better, cooler than some guy who didn't have a single special bone in his body. ]
[ He spoke. ]
...That's fine.
[ And while it was the truth for the sake of Alphonse... ]
[ It was the most horrible lie he had ever told himself. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 12:55 am (UTC)[Not that he's against bedsharing but it's up to Watanuki's comfort level.]
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 01:33 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 01:40 am (UTC)... tonight, I'll chase away your dreams.
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:02 am (UTC)[ Watanuki doesn't mind being close to Alphonse. In fact, he really like it. ]
[ But... the small bit of silence between them doesn't last for very long. Beside the blond, Watanuki takes a deep breath. ]
...Alphonse-kun?
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:09 am (UTC)[He opens his eyes -- Watanuki sounds serious again.]
[ Action ] 1/2
Date: 2012-11-18 02:24 am (UTC)...I want to tell you something... important.
But I'm not too sure if...
...What I'm trying to say, is...
[ He felt like he was going to strangle on his own words. Watanuki's two-toned eyes closed tightly. He tucked his chin in a bit, as if trying to hide. ]
I... um...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:38 am (UTC)[ Action ] 2/??? What, I'm a liar.
Date: 2012-11-18 02:25 am (UTC)...I like you, Alphonse-kun. And I mean...!
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:40 am (UTC)Oh.]
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:26 am (UTC)Wh-which I do! But what I mean is...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:41 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:27 am (UTC)I-I know I want to be near you... close to you!
And I think about what I can do to make you happy... and... I...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:42 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:28 am (UTC)I-I know ever since Negi-san left, things have been difficult for you...
And I felt bad, that, this is how I felt, when I know... you still...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:44 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:30 am (UTC)So... so...!
So I had to say it! I...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:45 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:32 am (UTC)I-I have...
I have feelings for you, Alphonse-kun... and...
I really, really like you...
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:46 am (UTC)[ Action ] 8/8!!! DONE, SHIT.
Date: 2012-11-18 02:35 am (UTC)...I... I've been wanting to tell you for so long... but I was always... too nervous to.
...I like you. [ And that was that. ]
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:51 am (UTC)[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 02:58 am (UTC)[ ...And Watanuki just learned the meaning of it. ]
[ Watanuki remains silent, and his eyes are screwed shut. But when Alphonse says nothing, and when those seconds that drag along turning into crawling minutes, the two-toned boy knew the answer, even when Alphonse didn't speak. Especially since he didn't. ]
[ And he only had two words for it. ]
[ Watanuki kept his eyes closed. He didn't open them. There was no need to. And if he kept his eyes closed, then he couldn't see Alphonse's face, and he wouldn't... ]
[ It took everything he had to keep his voice from trembling. ]
...Good night.
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 03:02 am (UTC)But he won't. Watanuki was immensely brave, to tell him all of this, and Al isn't going to run away to save his own feelings. This was his friend, someone he cared for, even if he didn't care for him like that, that bravery deserved a response.
He takes a shaky breath, wets his lips.]
[ Action ] 2/2
Date: 2012-11-18 03:10 am (UTC)You -- you are very, very brave. Braver than I am right now.
[He bites down on his lip slightly.]
... I care for you very much, Watanuki, but I... I won't lead you on with false hope or what-ifs. I... feel very strongly about you too, but it's not the same way.
But I want to stay with you, I want to support you, even if our feelings are different. I'm not going anywhere, provided... that's what you want.
[ Action ]
Date: 2012-11-18 03:26 am (UTC)[ He had been in Adstringendum just shy of a year now, and this whole time, he noticed something about the people he had gotten to know, and whom he had gotten close to. The world-travelers Syaoran and Sakura had come, and as he thought, eventually left without so much of a goodbye. Yuuko was here for merely a week, and all she did was tease him. ]
[ Neither Doumeki nor Himawari arrived, and while no, he wouldn't want them to come here and be stuck in this crap-sack world, he... ]
[ He had felt so alone. People had others from where they came from... why couldn't he have the same? And why was it always his bad luck, his stupid blood, his stupid dreams, his stupid... misfortune... that ended up pulling through? Above all other things? ]
[ Maybe that was the reason he was stuck in Adstring. Maybe it wasn't about stupid animus, maybe the scientists were just some elaborate bullshit story. Maybe it was just about the pure and simple fact that he was unfortunate, and didn't really exist. Was just a fraction of a person. A fraction. And thus, had no real home, and Adstringendum was the only place available for him to have a semblance of a normal life. And even then... ]
[ And Watanuki hated himself for taking on the whole, 'Oh woe is me' thought process, but for the first time in a long time... for the first time in a very long while... ]
[ Whatever his nightmare had been... ]
[ He wanted it to come true. And he hated that. ]
[ But here was Alphonse, and he knew Alphonse wouldn't lie to him. He knew he meant every word, that even though he didn't feel the same, he would stick beside him, that they could still be friends, that they could be together just as they were. Back home, he had always been on the bottom rung. Always underneath the amazing Doumeki. Never popular with Himawari, or any other girls for that matter. The nice guy... and always last place. ]
[ And maybe... ]
[ ...That was where he belonged. ]
[ And Watanuki's eyes opened. He stared at Alphonse, and now, he couldn't cry. He knew... he really did care for Alphonse... because a part of him knew that even though Alphonse wouldn't ever look at him the same, that he still wanted him to find someone to make him happy... even if it wasn't him. And he deserved someone better, cooler than some guy who didn't have a single special bone in his body. ]
[ He spoke. ]
...That's fine.
[ And while it was the truth for the sake of Alphonse... ]
[ It was the most horrible lie he had ever told himself. ]
[ Action ]
From:[ Action ]
From:[ Action ]
From:[ Action ]
From: