[ an anguished scream, it's not loud per se, but it's gut-wrenching. it collapses back into sobbing, disjointed mutters of 'please' or 'claude.'
he can't calm down, not properly. claude's always done it for him. he does become dizzy, however; drained. it isn't until then that he tilts his head against al's shoulder, breathing shallowly, blood dripping lightly from his bottom lip. ]
[Al holds him through it, lets him scream out the tantrum, cry until there's nothing left. Time means very little right now. He strokes his hair, arms warm and steady.]
[ he hasn't it in him to move, so he rests there, vaguely lulled even if most of it was tuckering himself out. he wipes his lip with his wrist, swallows, winces. and, al is warm, which makes him desire less to pull away and put himself back in the cold air. ]
Dear one, you can't go biting your tongue like that. Or hurting yourself- it might feel better for the moment, but your body is precious, and it's the only one you've got.
[He strokes his hair, his voice heavy.]
I learned that too.
[It was a heavy admission to make, and one he rarely mentioned out loud, but when he'd first gotten his body back, he'd been too fascinated with sensation. Thankfully it wasn't never near this level.]
[ ah, al has accidentally given him something to hide behind. to feel less weak, less like this. something that won't necessarily work (this is al. a truly good person, after all), but has always worked for the lewd-minded men he's been around before.
the movements are slight, a raised shoulder, half-lowered eyelashes, his lip curls a little, in what should just be the right amount. practiced, subtle, but to the point of perfection. he's already pretty, but he knows how to make himself look even more alluring. ]
[Thankfully, Urahara had warned him well enough in advance that it only caused a small shiver of worry for him. Al took a deep breath, set a hand on top of his head in a fatherly way.]
[ as if al's peered right in through his rib cage. his guts twist. he becomes too aware of the stinging of his tongue, the icy air on his hands, the dirt.
what, exactly, is he to do? how is it so many people catch onto him so quickly? his heart is thrumming against his eardrums. ]
[He doesn't hug him close again. Instead he looks at his eyes, his face, watching him and not the surface. Al's eyes aren't flat or distant. There are lines on his face, worry and caring, a note to his voice that begs Alois to listen.]
[ it has a way of making him feel more vulnerable, more revealing. in the span of a couple moments, he peers back with eyes that are too wide, anxious and uncertain, and then they fall away in irritated shame. he swallows, as he has been since cutting his tongue a little, and digs his fingers into the grass to stave himself from another flinch.
it's good it smarts so much. he hopes claude is feeling it, too, somehow. but, he deserves this. al is unnervingly, perfectly kind, and all alois can think of is how disgusting he is.
just like that, though, he's looking back up, laughing everything off lightly. ]
Didn't you say something like that inside? I heard you. It's fine! Don't be strange. Let's put her to sleep, now. Let's give her flowers. She'll grow her own, too, you know. Isn't that beautiful?
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2012-10-20 07:50 pm (UTC)I need Claude! [ that's livid, the next immediately slips back into desperation, though. ] Please, please I need Claude. Please, give him to me.
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Date: 2012-10-20 07:55 pm (UTC)[Reminding him, gently but firmly.]
You have me right now. Breathe.
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Date: 2012-10-20 08:12 pm (UTC)he can't calm down, not properly. claude's always done it for him. he does become dizzy, however; drained. it isn't until then that he tilts his head against al's shoulder, breathing shallowly, blood dripping lightly from his bottom lip. ]
no subject
Date: 2012-10-20 08:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-20 08:44 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-10-20 11:14 pm (UTC)[He strokes his hair, his voice heavy.]
I learned that too.
[It was a heavy admission to make, and one he rarely mentioned out loud, but when he'd first gotten his body back, he'd been too fascinated with sensation. Thankfully it wasn't never near this level.]
no subject
Date: 2012-10-21 07:37 pm (UTC)the movements are slight, a raised shoulder, half-lowered eyelashes, his lip curls a little, in what should just be the right amount. practiced, subtle, but to the point of perfection. he's already pretty, but he knows how to make himself look even more alluring. ]
You think it's precious?
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Date: 2012-10-22 02:49 am (UTC)... that doesn't make you an object, either.
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Date: 2012-10-22 03:04 am (UTC)what, exactly, is he to do? how is it so many people catch onto him so quickly? his heart is thrumming against his eardrums. ]
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Date: 2012-10-22 04:34 am (UTC)[He doesn't hug him close again. Instead he looks at his eyes, his face, watching him and not the surface. Al's eyes aren't flat or distant. There are lines on his face, worry and caring, a note to his voice that begs Alois to listen.]
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Date: 2012-10-22 07:51 pm (UTC)it's good it smarts so much. he hopes claude is feeling it, too, somehow. but, he deserves this. al is unnervingly, perfectly kind, and all alois can think of is how disgusting he is.
just like that, though, he's looking back up, laughing everything off lightly. ]
Didn't you say something like that inside? I heard you. It's fine! Don't be strange. Let's put her to sleep, now. Let's give her flowers. She'll grow her own, too, you know. Isn't that beautiful?
no subject
Date: 2012-10-23 05:36 am (UTC)All right. Be ready to cover her.
[He lays the hen gently in the hole, watching it, deep in thought.]